Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Toast. I want it.

This is toast.  It's really all I want right now.

All those snacks the other day (previous post) started another wave of food longing, dammit.  For those who've just tuned in, I cannot eat or drink at all the regular way, instead using a marvellous tube directly through my abdomen wall into my stomach. 

Most every day, I am completely fine with it.  I shared lunch wth my wife yesterday, which is unusual as we typically eat at different times, but I was due for a feed (which I do 5 times a day fairly clockwork-ish) and she had soup and rolls ready so we sat and dined together.  Well, she dined, I tubed my homemade blend of stuff.  It was lovely, but along with a few other things kicked me back into eating grief.

I have realised I may never quite get over it, you know.  Meeta has compared it to losing a limb, and there's a lot in that thought.  Unlike quitting say, smoking - which was not exactly easy I can assure you - this is not something I can actually choose to do again.

Big thing, food, isn't it?  I am now more of a gourmand than ever, and mostly this pleases me because I can really get off on imagination.

But then sometimes I just really want to make myself some toast.

Oh well, thanks for listening.  I feel better now.

Now that I think about it, it has been ages since I've had this reaction.  So, yay me, I suppose!

Still, shame about the toast.  If someone had used as an example of cherishing life in each and every moment, (because you never know when you might be suddenly struck by a re-entering zero-gravity toilet from a defunct space station), the idea of contemplation of the simplicity of toast - I may have had a chuckle.

Seriously folks, do please make your next piece of toast the best you've ever had.  It will be so worth it.

1 comment:

  1. Just read your toast story as the smell of burnt toast wafted through the house and the crust of a particuly burnt bit, stuck between my gum and a tooth. At least I know as it hurts all day that I can have another piece of toast and do appreciate that I can.